For a little while now I really believed I was doing fine with being back in Canada. Content and enjoying a new season. I’ve seen His timing in everything. I didn’t realize til looking back just how much stress we carried in our bodies while living there. And this isn’t to put Honduras down or anything, because I dearly love Honduras and it’s people with all my heart. I always will.
However there are things I don’t miss and in hindsight I realize brought a lot of trauma. Certain things became the norm. Things we can’t unsee. Things that even now break me when I remember. I truly believe God’s hand of protection covered us while we lived there. We may never know to what extent or how many times harm was diverted from our lives. ( I think of all the times I walked ALONE to and from Walmart with groceries) I don’t think twice about doing that here and the difference is I carry my purse and wear my wedding bands.) Even though we were robbed twice, and our precious puppy poisoned, I still see His protection those times. I know it could have been much worse if I’d woke up and confronted the intruders.
So today when Dale and I were talking about Honduras and whether we would still be there if the pandemic hadn’t happened. Dale replied “maybe” and then out of the blue I couldn’t finish my thoughts because I started bawling and the tears started flowing. “When we first moved there, I thought we’d be there forever.”
It’s ok to have days where grief catches you off guard. It’s all a part of the process. I’m so thankful for His grace. His presence in our lives. He was with us in Honduras and He is with us now, ordering our steps. One day at a time.